What are the chances of my going to prison ?

Yes. And prison might not be far away. Better talk to a criminal defense attorney.

Is there any sort of liability waiver that would allow me to be the guardian of myself with my parents agreement? (17)

If you can get yourself emancipated in time. A bagpipe band? You cannot sign a waiver, a contract or anything else of legal import.

First offender laws

It will if he keeps his nose clean. Letting an inmate kiss him is not prudent behaviour.

Do all charges or cases get expunged when a juvenile turns the age of 24 or 26 for habitual offenders in Florida ?

No, you do not qualify. You are 19 and say you have a clean adult record? That is not very long.

No

Need a question.

What is it called when you take care of someones financial matters and he knows but now hes saying i stoled from him?

Embezzlement.

Can I get charged for serious assault charge for slightly pushing a person?

You can get "charged" for anything. Contact a criminal defense attorney.

Poss charge (meth)

None, unless you find a good criminal attorney and find new friends.

Mr. Raskopf is correct.