Don't listen to California lawyers who know nothing about Texas law. In Texas a conviction can not be changed from a felony to a misdemeanor. You can get a pardon, but barring that there is no motion to change a conviction to a lower degree of offense.
I am curious about what you pled to. The minimum sentence for a State jail felony is 180 days state jail. You should check your plea paperwork (judgment). There are certain agreements (12.44) that treat state jail felony cases like...
Your boyfriend needs an attorney immediately.First, you'll need a lawyer to evaluate your boyfriends arrest and how an illegal arrest would affect his case (if at all).
Second, you'll need a lawyer to explain how federal/state cases are different, and the nature of indictments/arrest warrants.
Third, if you have been indicted then you will be arrested and set for an initial detention hearing in federal court. Bail is different in federal cases. It's not just an issue of having enough money...
The odds on a criminal defendant winning on appeal in Texas are statistically quite low. The Court of Criminal Appeals wants the State to win on appeal. Still, to get a better answer you need to meet with a local experienced criminal appeal lawyer. Appeals are very complicated and this 5th Amendment issue needs to researched and investigated by an experienced post conviction lawyer.
DO NOT TURN YOURSELF IN WITHOUT A LAWYER. You need to contact a criminal defense lawyer immediately and make a plan for how to proceed. Intoxication assault is a 3rd degree felony in Texas, you are facing 2-10 years in prison. It's not time to go it alone. You need professional legal help now. Most defense lawyers (including our firm) offer free consultations. You need to schedule one ASAP.
Your judge ultimately decides how many chances a father gets. If cost is a concern the Attorney General has a child support unit that may be able to help you recover past due child support. If your wife has spent $17,000 on enforcement motions then she should have a lawyer advising her and I would address this question to that attorney.
This is not a privileged forum and you should not post anymore details about what happened online. I would recommend you schedule a consultation with a local criminal defense lawyer to discuss your options. One statute that could get this adult in trouble is
§ 33.021. ONLINE SOLICITATION OF A MINOR. (a) In this
(1) "Minor" means:
(A) an individual who represents himself or
herself to be younger...
Could it be considered assault? Sure. Anyone can call the police and say they were assaulted; and a prosecutor could decide to charge someone based on the scenario you posted, however inequitable that would seem. It's important that you find a local defense lawyer to help your husband. Do not talk to the police without an attorney. You do not know what this girl said to the cops, and you do not know if the police already believe her.