Spousal support in Virginia is not a punishment for wrongdoing by a spouse , so his adultery alone would not justify a support award. Instead, spousal support is based primarily on one party's need and the pther party's ability to pay.
Spousal support can be awarded in the Juvenile and Domestic Relations District. This court uses a statutory formula for calculating support. The statute provides:
A. There shall be a presumption in any judicial proceeding for pendente lite spousal support and...
Divorce is a difficult and emotional process. It is typical for a client to be scared AND confused. Much of the problem is not legal in nature and cannot be handled exclusively by lawyers. It is for that reason that all parties in divorce and/or custody cases should have some contact (the amount needed is determined on a case by case basis) with a counselor or therapist. this will help the parties deal with the often unreasonable expectations and fears.
Also, lawyers know how things SHOULD be...
Since the PSA states that the amount is modifiable, she could be awarded a different amount based upon proof of changed circumstances.
There is no "cap" on final divorce support awards.
She is bound by the PSA as to the duration of the support.
At 18 he "legally" is an adult with all of the rights and responsibilities that come with it. You have the right to tell him that if he wants to stay in your house, he has to follow your rules. If he refuses, you can evict him.
You can schedule a hearing to have the contract (which is what the Agreement is) be made into a court Order and then have it enforced by contempt. You also no longer need to have court hearings for uncontested divorces. Virginia authorizes the use of Affidavits effective July 1, 2012. Your money would be well spent to consult with a lawyer.
If the case is being heard in New York, then they are applying New York law. Under Virginia law, the court can award support from the date of filing forward. It cannot go back before the date of filing for support. The relationship between the parent and child, however, has no bearing on the duty to provide support.
You can petition the court to change the child's name. The father would be served with Notice, and he could appear in court and contest the name change or he may choose not to appear. If he does not object, a name change order will be entered.
If custody is at issue in a divorce case then the mental and physical condition of the parties are statutory factors that must be considered by the court. For a very brief period, there was a statute in Virginia that made mental health records exempt from disclosure in such situations. That is no longer the case, and the situation is as it always has been. The records can be subpoenaed and a court will compel their production if there is a custody issue.