Yes you can ask, but he doesn't have to pay you.
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Yes
You have 30 days to request a trial from the date of the citation. If you wish to be heard you should check the "trial box". Feel free to contact me for more information.
Yes
You may be able to negotiate agreement with the bank and/or you may have the option of consulting with a bankruptcy attorney if all else fails.
Yes, this happens everyday.
The answer to your question would depend on various details of the incident and whether he was properly informed of his rights. There is a possibility that the evidence collected against him or the statements made by him may be suppressed.
There are various parties that could be held responsible for the damage and the answer may vary depending on the state. However, your husband should most likely have insurance on the UHAUL truck for any driver that is driving it. Your husband could be responsible for the damages under the theory of negligent entrustment, however, he could ask/sue for contribution/reimbursement from his friend.
First I should inform you that I am licensed to practice in Maryland and the law in your state MAY be different. However, generally speaking juveniles can only be incarcerated and/or committed to a Juvenile facility until they are 21 years old (this is a maximum). This is assuming they are tried (have a merits hearing) as a Juvenile and the State does not attempt/waive them you to adult court.