Are we supposed to create an "Estate" legally? Can I do this without legal representation?

Sit with a probate attorney for an initial consult. Most are free and they will let you know if your father's estate requires attention.

Is there a fair amount that I can be compensated based on the value of her estate?

The document may detail...otherwise reasonable costs and expenses only.

Transferring my home to my children through a life estate. Will I be able to do this even though I have a mortgage?

A beneficiary deed allows for non-probate transfer in MO so long as filing occurs five years or more before benefits are received. Check with a NY...

Was the money hers? Or should it have been paid to my father and part of his estate?

Sounds like it was all hers if she was the only remaining beneficiary.

Can I sell it for $1.00

I suspect their claims period has run but sit and discuss with an attorney immediately to make certain.

How can I securely give my land to my grandchildren (medical)

A beneficiary deed appears to be the product you seek. Hire legal counsel and ask them to draft one for your review and signature. It would...

Hire legal counsel to address this in the county where your father resided. It's just not worth performing the acts yourself and risk missing...

What can I do about this. I have tried to think of what to do for years.

You may not know the full extent of the documents or estate. I encourage you to hire legal counsel immediately to investigate.

How can we start process of step parent adoption ?

You hire experienced counsel. If the natural parent objects the cards are stacked against you.

What to do? I'm supposed to be moving 340 miles away in three months can he stop me from leaving?

Yes he can object to your relocation. Your original judgment contains such language. Hire counsel to address.