Would hiring a PI attorney be the best option?

Absolutely. There's never a negative to retaining counsel if you're injured. Insurance companies take advantage of unrepresented parties. Always.

Can I, as a family member of a victim, contact the defense attorney?

First, my condolences on so many list. Second, if the family is represented in either the civil wrongful death suit or advised by a lawyer in...

Is this normal and should I fill it out?

If you didn't hire a lawyer, this is normal. Rather than play games with your rights and a serious injury, get counsel retains now.

Who's fault is it? Can there be a court date?

Were his warning lights in? Was he pulled into the shoulder area? We're he or passenger injured? Generally people must be alert for others...

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Since we are BOTH under the same claim number, do I release Geico if sign the check made out this way? What "law" applies?

Some insurance carriers require spouses to sign but it's not the law. If your wife wants the money, you need to sign releasing all claims. If you...

Is it to soon to contact medical malpractice lawyer.

Yes, definitely get right on it and talk to a malpractice attorney. While some procedures carry risk of infection, leakage, nicking of nerves,...

Can I be forced to return to the job? Is it possible to progress too far to get a settlement?

First question is why don't you have a lawyer? This is a serious and life altering injury. Stop right now and get a lawyer! Don't worry about...

Is this something can be done pro se? Is this too late to hire an atty? Not a lot of funds, I am after all, a federal employee.

This is very fact specific. I don't handle these types of cases, but I suspect you can answer your own question if you review the rules on notice...

Can I sue the county and accuser for false accusations,false arrest,slander,mental distress,lost of my job and home,humiliation

Possibly. But you'll get nowhere without a lawyer. Contact one to evaluate your options. Time limits are short, so don't delay.

Is there liability here? For anything in addition to slander?

I'd just tell you to contact a lawyer to evaluate the specific facts, but you know that already.