Detainer Summons left in mailbox while I was out of town. I actually received 1 day before the court date

Calling for a reset is your best first option. They're supposed to give you 5 days notice prior to a hearing.

Google Child Support Office and then call the office most local to you for help in finding this out.

I have literally no idea. I would suggest talking to an attorney because you could be looking at anything from time served to the remainder of the...

What kind of charges would he get?

I could guess that his charge would be possession of a controlled substance without a prescription. But that's purely a guess.

Can my husband get to be the custodial parent in our divorce?

Without more facts, I have literally no idea. Contact an attorney.

How can I legally break lease without penalty

You may want to have an attorney to review your lease to see if there are grounds for breaking it and moving out.

Can I be suspended?

Yes, they should. But it sounds like they're going to do whatever they want. Tough situation and they have all the power.

Is there a legal solution to my situation?

I would suggest terminating your lease due to their failure to comply and finding a different place to live.

How would I go about filing for divorce from my husband that I've been separated from since 2001 bc he's been in and out of pris

You need to contact an attorney and they will be able to help you.

Can I recant my statement without going to jail for a domestic dispute that has turned a molehill into a mountain?

Maybe, but you may get charged for contradicting your previous statements.