My son mental health and ADHD

You may want to consider pursuing a guardianship for your son.

My uncle was alive when I did the poa to purchase he died in march 2010 the property was deeded to me in 9-09

The way your question is worded causes some concern. Get a consult w/ a local elder law attorney and inquire about a fiduciary's duty--there may be...

JTWROS means it goes to the survivor of the account--its not part of the probatable estate.

My mother had a stroke three months ago, my sister is POA.

Your sister has the POA and has to act for your mom's best interests. You need a consult with your own local attorney.

Should we sell our $500 stock before spouse goes to nursing home

Stock or cash, it has value. Converting it from one form to another doesn't really matter.

Can my husband sell his car to his stepson before going into a nursing home without penalty

It will be viewed as a full value transaction regardless of what he actually receives.

I had power of att.before my mother died .and another member of the family was entered as executive of her estate.

Get a consult w/ a local estate attorney. You can present the estate w/ bills for the efforts you had paid for.

Am I protected from the actions of a previous poa if I have a legal revocation form and a new poa.

Follow Mr. Goldman's advice--record the POA.

I have POA for my father who now wants to control his own affairs. What kind of lawyer do I need?

Get a consult with a local elder law attorney.

Is my ex entitled to my military retirement?

The judge's decision governs and the QDRO needs to be completed and filed--otherwise, you can be looking at contempt.