I live in ny, am I responsible for my husbands child support outside of marriage?

No, you are not, but he might be. Speak to an attorney to discuss how to protect your assets.

Can I consider some of the lies told to my children to be a form of child abuse?

I am not sure what your question is.

What Will a judge do or order if I petition for a refrain from on my 18 yr old son?

It doesn't sound like there are grounds for you to file an Order of Protection.

My daughters have been asking for years to live with me full time and there father reuses. what mothers rights do I have

You would need to file a petition to request a change in custody for your children.

Do I need to obtain a lawyer?

You need to hire local counsel in Monroe County asap, to help you deal with this as soon as possible.

Will a New York court factor in my UK court-ordered child support obligation during divorce proceedings?

I don't know why your attorney would say such a thing. You need to speak to your attorney and straighten things out, before you "bankrupt yourself".

Yes, it happens in many cases. Please speak with your attorney to discuss.

Should I file the emergency petition to remove the child from my ex-house?

I don't know if an emergency petition is the way to go. You may wish to speak to your attorney to discuss whether a violation petition would make...

What's going to happen?

They all need attorneys asap to get their life back in order. Unless there is unimaginable damage, there can be a way to fix things, but it will...

Do I have any recourse for having been left out of my son's funeral arrangements.

Its hard to tell without knowing any additional information.