Is there any traffic ticket with points not transferable from NY to NJ?

I have seen some courts in NY amend speeding to a really expensive parking ticket.

How do I find if there is a restraining order on someone?

If there is a restraining order it would be served on him. If he is unsure, he can contact the family division.

You should say not guilty and that you want a lawyer. Then have a consultation and determine what's best to do

What is the best way to handle my situation?

First of all you should have a personal consultation with an attorney and consider retaining one. Realistically The most serious part of this is...

Yes, an arrest remains on your criminal case history unless it is expunged.

Is a alleged Domestic Violence incident with an alleged gun with No victim expunge -able.

You said you never arrested, but somehow there a police report and prosecutor involved. That doesn't make sense.

Yes the third offense carries a mandatory 10 days in jail. The best way to avoid a 3rd offense i never plead to the first offense.

Five points, suspension of your license, plus fines and surcharges that can add up to over $1000.

What can happen if I don't go to the court date for a petite theft charge

Hire a lawyer. They may be able to get the matter adjourned so that a warrant is not listed.

A criminal defense lawyer who has experienced in the county where this matter is presiding