Can the divorce be put on hold to try to reconcile?

The older your case the less time and opportunity the court will play ball with you for a delay.

What can I stop and protect myself and son from constant confront of emotional and verbal abuse with a father with anger issues?

While you would have to provide specifics in court which your question does not, still, assuming it's true the experience and instincts say anger...

What preventing court order the court can issue in order to control parental alienation?

File a motion for more parenting time, spell it out like you have here, get your bigger schedule and stick to it. Really. If she disobey enforce...

What grounds do I have to kick her out? Or can I , or what should I do? She won't leave

I agree. Your lawyer will help you resolve all the issues. Then you can achieve Inependence.

What would you recommend as the ratio split xpenses for 3 children's activities/ tuition and living expenses?

65/35 across the board so discuss what expenses are really necessary

What legal action and recourse can I seek in court against my ex after I proof that parental alienation exist

Find a good alienation expert. Know what you want. Love your child. They will see what's what.

What do I do from here?

You have the right to share. You have to show a substantially changed circumstance to warrant a modification of a court order for parenting time....

Yes but be warned the court will not see you as a hero (even though your a hero) because the courts simply don't care enough and don't want to...

Losing my Home Family Law

The standard of review on a change circumstances application is that there has been a substantial change of circumstances. Substantial is Loosely...

Its called an Order and or a Consent Order. Then insert the agreed modification terms, have both sides sign, and submit to the judge for signature.