There are many answers to this question. Generally, Washington will not terminate a father's parental rights simply to avoid paying child support. If there is an individual who will adopt the child (e.g., your new spouse), his rights will be terminated in the adoption process and he will be relieved of paying ongoing support.
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The short answer is yes. In order to establish a custody arrangement (i.e., which parent the child shall reside with), you will need to get a parenting plan entered with the court. While a divorce is pending, you can file a motion for temporary orders to include a temporary parenting plan.
Unless the parenting plan provides otherwise, a new plan signed by a judge should be entered.
From the facts you have presented, it appears you will need to commence a nonparental custody action in the Superior Court of the county where you reside. RCW 26.10 You should also report the abuse to the the police.
Correction to my previous post: the applicable statute is RCW 26.04.070 rather than the posted 26.09.070.
In the solemnization of marriage no particular form is required, except that the parties thereto shall assent or declare in the presence of the minister, priest, or judicial officer solemnizing the same, and in the presence of at least TWO ATTENDING WITNESSES, that they take each other to be husband and wife. RCW 26.09.070 (emphasis added). Thus, it appears from your post, the marriage is not valid, particularly when combined with the other facts you have shared (e.g., drinking, no license,...
Aside from any potential criminal implications (i.e., bigamy), Washington is a "no fault" State, which means one can simply allege the marriage is "irretrievably broken"; thus, no grounds are needed. You may commence a divorce action with or without his signature, although service of the action is required.
I also recommend you may use a lawyer in the COUNTY in which your former spouse/significant other is located, although any licensed Washington attorney could assist you.