A lawyer could serve as executor for your will. Generally, lawyers are relunctant to do this, however, in cases where there is no other option, many lawyers would be willing to serve as an executor or trustee.
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Most attorneys are willing to offer a free consultation where they would review your parents' wills and advise them as to whether or not they should consider updating them. Updating one's will after a major family event (death of a beneficiary, birth of a new child of the testator) is usually a good idea as then no one can claim that the decedent had changed their mind and their will no longer speaks to their wishes; however, if someone is changing their will too often, that can also be a sign...
It will be very difficult to avoid having your marriage affect your credit score. However, you can mitigate the affect it would have by not having joint bank accounts/credit cards and not taking out a mortgage together. Conversely, if you choose to do any of these (and manage them responsibly), you may be able to help your wife's credit rating over the long term and while you may take a ding or two right away, you should be able to build your rating back up over a year or two.
Generally, there is no in-state requirement to be executor. To be appointed, however, you will have to sign a document stating you agree to abide by the laws of Virginia and you will need to name someone who can accept service of process in Virginia on behalf of you. You may also be required to post a bond ensuring that you will carry out your duties properly.
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