Attorney Fromm is correct. Your situation will be controlled by your particular fact pattern, and, in particular, the order of who passed away. It's be to consult with local counsel to confirm your rights. A qualified estate/probate attorney will be able to quickly assess your situation.
Your question requires far more detail than you provided. Was there a Will? If so, did the Will state to whom your mother-in-law left the jewelry? Quite honestly, the fact that he deeded the house over to you as the executor (if I'm reading that right) likely has absolutely nothing to do with the jewelry that was in the house at the time. For a more complete answer, please provide additional information about your situation.
In all honestly, it sounds like a scam. If the debt is 10+ years old, unless you continued to pay on it or reaffirmed the debt, they are barred by a 6 year statute of limitations to commence an action to collect for breach of contract. They can't just "go to the county office" and do anything except file an action against you. Demand verification of the debt in writing and issue them a cease and desist letter to stop the calls, but I suspect it isn't legitimate.
Do you HAVE TO redo your will? No. Is it probably adviseable coming from another jurisdiction/state (if I'm reading your inquiry correctly)? Probably, if for no other reason than to ensure that the laws of the jurisdiction where you presently reside control over the will and your assets. I'd be less concerned about redoing your health care proxy and power of attorney, but still, it's adviseable. As to a trust versus a will, it's impossible to say which makes more sense for you given the few...
If you raised these concerns at closing without them being satisfied at that time, you should have insisted that an escrow amount be held back to ensure that everything was in fact completed as promised. At this point, contact the attorney who handled your closing for your alternatives.
Consult with a local bankruptcy attorney. Yes, a wife can file bankrupcty without her husband being a part of the case. While that's well and good if all you have is debt in your own name, you need to assess what is the proper move if you have joint debt. The fee will vary slightly between practitioner and what chapter you end up filing under. Your siituation needs a more thorough analysis than is capable here.
He can terminate your monthto month leasehold, then commence a holdover proceeding against you to remove you from the premises. However, if it is in fact an illegal apartment, as you say, New York courts will not allow him to pursue back rent that is due.
She has an obligation to act as your father's fiduciary. This means that she cannot engage in any self-dealing or misappropriation of funds. If she were to change the beneficiary designation and the pension accepted those changed (which I question they would do in the first place), you would have a basis to challenge any inappropriaate actions she took on behalf of your father as a violation of her duties.
Depending on the age/mileage of the car, the nature of the repairs, how long the vehicle was rendered unuseable, how long it sat at the garage, etc., you might have a basis for bringing a claim against the dealership. As suggested by the questions I just posed, these are very fact dependent cases, so you'd be best served by consulting with counsel that handles lemon law cases in your area.