Why are divorces so expensive and how to keep the costs DOWN
How can it be that a divorce, an already traumatic process that no one predicted would happen on their wedding day, costs more than THE WEDDING & HONEYMOON!? Sometimes the factors will be out of your control but some of the factors to keep your attorneys fees down are completely within your control
GETTING DIVORCEDThe sad fact is that it takes TWO to get married but only ONE to get out. In order to get through this traumatic process in the least scathing and fastest way will largely depend on the players in your "sandbox" so to speak.
FACTORS YOU CAN CONTROL TO KEEP DIVORCE FEES DOWN1. Don't be "penny wise and pound foolish" don't skimp out on the attorney you hire just because one's retainer is a little higher. Look at what the ACTUAL HOURLY RATES are because that is indicative of how your attorney will work through your retainer before seeking the next replenishment in your matter.
2. Understand that no matter how you may have been wronged by the other party, at the end of the day, concluding a divorce matter is really the same thing as negotiating a business deal. The one of you that will fair better is the one who can think more logically and not emotionally.
3. Make sure that your lawyer is a "fit" for you. Listen, really listen, to your gut instinct (I call it your belly barometer) when deciding who to hire. Experience is important but not more important than your feelings of intuition.
4. Don't listen to advice of hair dresser, nail salon woman, bartender, neighbors, friends, family members, co-workers (you get the idea) and then start second-guessing your attorney. You hired the attorney for a reason and you should trust your belly barometer about that. If you cannot trust your lawyer, that person probably shouldn't be your lawyer in the first place and certainly not the person guiding the consequences of your future. LISTEN TO YOUR LAWYER!
5. Try not to hire the lawyer with the loudest mouth, we've all met someone like that. When the person thinks that if they are loudest in the room, that others will perceive them as the smartest. That is not the truth. In fact, it is often the other way around.
6. Communication- this is a two way street and it is critical to the success of the case. Make sure your attorney explains things to you in an clear way and make sure you disclose all the facts to y our attorney. Thinking that you will save money by not speaking to your lawyer more frequently will find that decision usually costing them much more at the end of day.
7. Don't bring Law shows and Courtroom shows into how you think YOUR case should turn out. Lawyers go to school and train very long and very hard to master their profession. You cannot possibly expect your case to mirror something written by Hollywood sensationalist writers that are seeking ratings. Even if it is a "reality" TV show those are usually the most dramatic cases that make it to the show and no two sets of facts are ever identical. Also, in these instances, you have to figure out which presiding law the TV Court Judge is using, what state are they in, which laws are they enforcing.
8. Look at the case realistically, as in the Judge's seat. You have to be willing to see both sides of your case, as a Judge would. You have to be willing to sit on both sides of the fence because that is what a Judge would do. Only then will your expectations in a case become more realistic.
9. Don't use your divorce lawyer as your therapist. Lawyers nor Judges are not trained to treat psychiatric issues. Importantly also, mental health counselor's cost much less than spending the same amounts of time with your lawyer and the lawyer is not trained to be a psychologist.