How to Handle your Domestic Violence "stay-away" order
Do not contact the alleged victim yourself.First mistake by most people is trying to call the person and talk to them about "dropping the charges." First of all, its not their call anymore. Its up to the state and at least in california, they don't care if she doesnt' want to pursue charges.
Furthermore, if you call the alleged victim and the court finds out, you will likely be taken into custoday and your bail jacked up to prevent your release.
The only person that can contact your alleged victim is your attorney.
You cannot go back to your house.Even if you have a right to live there or even if you pay the mortgage, you cannot go back to where your alleged victim lives too. The court will allow them to stay at the residence pending the outcome of your case.
Consider taking classes.While some see this as an admission of guilt, its quite the opposite. In my opinion, it shows that you are taking responsiblity for the situation. You want to assure the court that you will do whatever is necessary to maintain the peace in your household while this case continues.