You have a right to file a grievance with the office of lawyer regulation against your ex husband's lawyer, if you feel they did something unethical, but your starting a lawsuit against him for slander would be an extremely difficult case to prove, particularly in the context of a nasty divorce case; another difficult part of such a lawsuit would be how you would be able to prove damages. I wrote a blog about defamation and slander cases, including damages at our firm's web site.
Generally, anything said in court or court pleadings is privileged....which means you cannot sue over what is said in court. Your reocurse is to litigate your case and present your facts that counter act the allegations of the other side.
The state bar deals with violations of the ethics rules. You can certainly make a report, but it won't amount to anything unless you can establish such a violation. Knowingly making a false statement of fact to a judge would constitute an ethics violation, but that would require establishing that the lawyer told the judge something that the lawyer knew was untrue. Just because you have a different story than your ex does not mean that his lawyer has an obligation to believe you over his client.
Legal arguments in court will not support a defamation claim (for several reasons). So such a claim won't do you any good unless you can show that the lawyer is contacting people outside of court and making false statements of fact about you. That's not likely to be the case.
To the extent that you can prove the attorney's statements are false, your best bet is to work with your lawyer to demonstrate that to the judge who is presiding in your case. That will do you a lot more good than an unwinnable civil claim or complaints to the bar.
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