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Will being an adult entertainer (cam model) hurt my chances of getting custody of my two children?

Manchester, NH |

I have been separated from my ex husband for 2 and a half years and we remained friends and co parented our children, although I cared for them the majority of the time. My children are my world and I am finding out just now that he is going to try and get full custody of our children because of my job. I have been working as a cam model or adult entertainer since Sept of last year. I primarily work while the kids are with him because right now it is split 50-50 1 week for him and one for me. But there have been a few nights where I have worked from home while they were in bed. He is using this as a reason as to why he should retain custody. Should I be worried? My kids enjoy going to visit him but always ask to come home when they are there. He has also lived in 4 places the last 2 yrs.

Also, there has been no financial support paid by either side but I retained the majority of the responsibility because I had them more than he did. If we stuck to the parenting plan we have right now, I agreed that he didn't need to pay me any child support. Right now, he is currently living with his girlfriend of 6 months who has done some iffy things and her son who has behavioral issues. I have maintained a residence solidly for the 2 and half years we have been apart. My reasoning in taking this job was so that I could be home with my children and not have to put them in child care. Although I understand the sensitive nature of my job, my children have no idea what I do besides that I work on my computer after they go to sleep.They have NEVER and would NEVER be subjected to the content of my job. I am really really scared. I just want to know if this could be a deciding factor for a judge to not grant me custody, which I so desperately want.

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Attorney answers 2


Before posting anything further, please keep in mind that this forum is open to the public (which includes your ex-husband), is meant for general rather than specific questions, and is not protected by any type of attorney-client privilege.

That being said, in making a ruling on custody, the presiding judge is to determine what arrangement is in the best interest of the children. Under New Hampshire law, the presiding judge is to consider a number of factors (see list at the link below), but none of us can tell you how your job alone will affect a particular judge's decision.

However, I think that you are right to be concerned about how a judge will react if you and your ex- dispute custody and the judge is asked to consider the nature of your work and the fact that you sometimes work from home while your children are there. Accordingly, I would strongly suggest that you try to work with your ex- to come up with an arrangement that both of you can live with -- rather than forcing a judge to step in and decide the matter for you.

Good luck to you.

Any answer or other information posted above is general in nature and is not intended, nor should it be construed, as legal advice. This posting does not create an attorney-client relationship between you and the posting attorney, and you are urged to engage a qualified attorney who is licensed to practice in the relevant jurisdiction.


Good advice above. Instead of providing all of the details on a public forum, consult with an attorney for the best opinion. It may be hard to find the time or funds to do so, but it will be very worthwhile to determine your best way to proceed and what points to raise.

That said, you do have some very positive facts in your corner from your narrative. There is a potentially negative fact in your career, but frankly, if you have the right argument, you can certainly make sure that it not a determinative factor. Again, counsel can help here.

Feel free to contact me if you would like to discuss your matter further.

Christine G. DeBernardis, Esq.
(603) 373-0545

This is not legal advice and is not intended to create an attorney-client relationship. You should speak to an attorney for further information.