You need to be extremely careful and get an attorney to walk you through.
The threat of a restraining order is not only its civil impact, but its criminal potential.
You should seek the assistance of the probate court by filing the appropriate motion.
You may also want to have a GAL appointed.
If you need assistance, or have questions contact me.
You need a lawyer. Today. Now. By letting her take control of the proceedings like this you will be constantly on the defense and not claiming your rights. You need a lawyer to establish clear guidelines for the house, the division of money and whether her boyfriend can even be in the house while your child is present. I might seek relief from the court by asking them to not allow this man in the house or if he does live in the house that he pay market rent. Get a lawyer, call the Springfield Bar Association and ask for a family lawyer.
You need a lawyer. If your wife has taken out a restraining order against you, there may be criminal ramifications. At this point, it is good that she dropped the order. However, you should call the local bar referral service (I assume that there is one in Springfield) and ask for the name of a Family Lawyer. Also, (although I don't recommend this as a solution) the Family and Probate Courts in Massachusetts usually have a Lawyer of the Day program, so if you want more detailed info and advice you may go there and speak to whovever is on duty. This is not a substitute for hiring your own counsel, but may make you feel like you have a slightly better handle on the information in the interim.
While a spouse cannot just change the locks to the marital home without a Court order granting her exclusive use and occupancy of the home, you really want to evaluate the motivation for having access to your home. Is it because there are items of personal property you want back or it is to ensure that the boyfriend does not come around. If it is the latter, you have to be very careful as she has already shown that she has no problems trying to get a restraining order against you and may very well try again. Some stones may be better left unturned.
You really want to speak with a lawyer about your options regarding this new boyfriend, but know that just because you believe that it is too soon does not mean that the Court will agree with you unless this new person posses a risk of harm to your child. If you suspect harm, you may want to explore the options of a GAL or request that the Court appoint a attorney for the child through the Children's Law Project, which is available in Hampden County, depending on your child's age.
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