It may be time to seek a guardianship from the court. This is something you should discuss in confidential detail with an attorney before you take any action. Good luck!
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I agree with my colelague
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I too agree with Ms. Brown. The procedure in New York is called a Guardianship under Article 81 of the Mental Hygiene Law. From what you've said, you have a vey good case to be appointed guardian. I refer you to this web publication for more information: http://www.ocfs.state.ny.us/ohrd/materials/151670.pdf
Lawyers often participate in this process as court monitors, similar to the role "Attorneys for the Children" play in Family Court proceedings, and there are panels of qualified lawyers appointed by the Courts. The Bar Association in your county can suggest an attorney who deals with Article 81 Guardianships to assist and advise you about this process.
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I am sorry to hear about your situation.
You should contact an attorney to discuss your questions as additional information would be helpful. Will he consent to a guardian? Will he consent to living in a home? If he won't consent, are you willing to go to ct. to get him help? Etc.
I wish you the best of luck.
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I agree that it is time to consider an Article 81 guardianship. You have very serious issues such as does anyone have a power of attorney, health care proxy, and other advance directives. The court will always look to these before granting guardianship. You want to be very careful that you do not in a situation with APS. You must act through a lawyer.