Contrary to popular belief, federal law does not control the division of military retirement benefits in a divorce. Federal law merely allows the states to divide military retirement as they would other retirement benefits.
Different states have different laws, so you will want to check with someone who practices in any jurisdiction your wife is likely to file (she may have a choice of different states) who is familiar with military divorce issues.
If you are still in the military, you can invoke the Servicemember's Civil Relief Act in order to have a stay in the proceedings until you are able to appear and defend.
As stated, different states have different laws, but if the divorce was in Arkansas the advice you were given would be very bad advice -- especially if you are not in the service any longer because she can serve you by publishing a warning order in the newspaper if she is unable to locate you. Then, if you do not file an answer she can get a judgment by default - and the Court CAN divide property, assign debt liabilities and order support even if you do not appear and defend.
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If you want to control matters and protect your retirement, hire a diviorce attorney and close the matter out. After two years if even one of you was serious you would already be divorced. You spending two years traveling will not protect your assets.
NOT LEGAL ADVICE. FOR EDUCATION AND INFORMATION ONLY. Mr. Rafter is licensed to practice before the state and federal courts in Virginia. There is no implied or actual attorney-client relationship arising from this education exchange. You should speak with an attorney licensed in your state, to whom you have provided all the facts before you take steps that may impact your legal rights. Mr. Rafter is under no obligation to answer subsequent emails or phone calls related to this matter.
Military families often find themselves in a world of confusion because sometimes it is not possible to establish personal jurisdiction to proceed with the property division issues in a divorce. It is always possible to obtain a divorce, sometimes by publication, but in Colorado, publication does not confer personal jurisdiction to divide marital assets such as a military pension. You would be well advised to consult with an attorney who understands military pensions. There are several very capable family law attorneys in Colorado Springs who can assist you.