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What can be done to stop someone from having friends help him stalk me?

Salem, OR |

My soon to be ex is using other persons to assist in stalking me, following me, taking pictures of my home, reporting back to him my activiites. I am told this isn't a violation of a TRO in place already. Is there any way that this can be illegal so it can be stopped?

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Attorney answers 3


modify the TRO to prohibit his involvement in hiring others to follow you. Good luck!

You should consult an attorney in your State at once. Visit our webpage and tell us what you think.



would I address this in the divorce hearing or ask for it now prior to the hearing in TRO court?


It probably is a violation of the TRO. Most TROs will account for the restrained party doing something directly or indirectly. If yours does not, have your lawyer get it modified. The judge won't like these facts, if they are accurate.



made police reports but they wont do anything unless I can prove the ex is involved, they said no proof he told any one to do anything, even showing my phone log with his friends numbers on it.


It really depends on the terms of this 'TRO.' I assume this means 'temporary restraining order,' but that's likely not quite right. There are two main kinds of restraining orders under Oregon law: Restraining orders under the Family Abuse Prevention Act; and Stalking Protective Orders.

You can ask the court for a restraining order under the Family Abuse Prevention Act (a FAPA order) if, within the previous 180 days, you have been physically harmed, threatened with physical harm, or forced to engage in sexual acts against your will. The perpetrator can be any person in your family or any person with whom you've had a sexual relationship in the past two years, or any co-parent of your child.

If you've been subjected to such violence by someone who doesn't fit that description, you may instead qualify for a Stalking Protective Order. You can ask the court for a Stalking Protective Order against any person who has repeatedly (two or more times) had contact with you that made you fear for your safety, or the safety of a family member. That fear must be objectively reasonable, as determined by a judge.

In either case, the person subject to the order is prohibited from contacting you either directly or through third parties. This applies both after the Order is served on them but before they have a hearing on it; and, if the Order is upheld at the hearing (and converted from temporary to permanent), thereafter.

It's not clear from the question what sort of order you have, or what its terms are, but if it was a restraining order issued by an Oregon court then it would prohibit this person from contacting you through third parties. The trick, then, is proving that these people are doing things on that person's behalf. You should consult with an attorney about this - you should do that if you're going through a divorce in any case. You can call the Oregon State Bar for a free referral at 503-684-3763.

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