I don't believe there is a legal question here. But, I have actually heard of a psychological condition that sounds like what you are experiencing. If I were you, I would find a good therapist that has experience with such a disorder and see if they can help. Good luck.
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You should consult with a therapist for advice.
If the therapist advises you to see an attorney-follow up with that advice.
The answer given does not imply that an attorney-client relationship has been established and your best course of action is to have legal representation in this matter.
I agree that this is not a legal question but a question for a therapist. Did you meet any therapist you think you could trust when you were hospitalized? If so, please call him or her for a referral.