“Shared parental responsibility,” which is the norm in the vast majority of custody cases, means a court-ordered relationship in which both parents retain full parental rights and responsibilities with respect to their child and in which both parents confer with each other so that major decisions affecting the welfare of the child will be determined jointly. While it sounds as though the father in your case is not following "shared parental responsibility," you should determine whether it was ordered by the court in your case. Look to the original custody decree to find that out. If the father is violating court-ordered shared parental responsibility, then you have the ability to go to court and have this addressed.
If you decide you want to do so, I suggest you speak to an attorney in your area who has experience in family law. That attorney would be best able to address the specific circumstances in your case and to explain the options you have. Good luck.
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