Bankruptcy law does not provide for a process of reaffirming a loan on real property. Any attempts to reaffirm would only be fake and FHA cannot require something that the law does not provide.
The idiots you are talking to a misleading you and you have swallowed it hook, line & sinker!
The Bankruptcy Code requires that for loans secured by personal property the debtor must state the debtor's intentions, one of which can be to reaffirm the debt. However, reaffirmation agreements must be filed with the bankruptcy court while the case is pending and before the discharge order is entered.
The Bankruptcy Code does not require that a debtor state his intention with respect to loans secured by real property. Loans secured by real estate can be reaffirmed, but often they are not. This is not necessarily bad advice from your attorney.
However, in a typical refinancing the existing loan would be paid off by a new loan. If you are pursuing typical refinancing, it makes no sense to try to reaffirm the existing loan just before it is paid in full. It may be that you have been given inaccurate information about what FHA requires.
This is not true. First, debtors (at least in Washington) do not reaffirm debts secured by real estate. It just doesn't happen. If a debtor chooses, they can continue paying the mortgage after the bankruptcy, but that's it. Also, as the previous attorney noted, if you're refinancing this means that you are paying off your old loan with a new loan. As such, why would you reaffirm a debt that you will be paying off?
It sounds to me as though there is a miscommunication somewhere.