Have her retain a local attorney, as the insurance company is her adversary.
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Read your policy. Almost certainly, only you can be subject to an EUO as an insured. This has been litigated in many states, but I don't know about Mass.
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I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Unfortunately it is virtually impossible to prove a DUI after the fact. I would retain local counsel to come up with a strategy. It doesn't sound like a strong case if you went the DUI angle but you could get her for something else.
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