He is correct if this is an incident being handled by the defendant's insurance company. The insurance company will send a representative with settlement authority. The reason you need to be there is to accept the offer if you find it to be adequate.
That is typically correct if they are covered by insurance and the value of your claim is within their policy limits. If the claim value exceeds the policy or there is a claim for exemplary damages then they will attend.
Sounds fine, the insurance will have their lawyers there with authority to settle.
Legal disclaimer: Talal B. Ghosheh. is licensed to practice law in the State of Georgia. All information given is based only on Georgia law, and is not directly applicable to any other jurisdictions, states, or districts. This response, or any response, is not legal advice. This response, or any response, does not create an attorney/client relationship. The response is in the form of legal education and is intended to provide general information. Any state specific concerns should be directed to an attorney who is licensed to practice law in that respective state.
Do you feel like you need the other driver to be there because it's unfair that you have to show up and he doesn't? Especially since the other side caused your injury. Or do you feel like you need the other side to be there so that you can confront him or demand an apology or an explanation and that will help settle the case? Either way, I can understand why you would think it is important, and you should explain that to your attorney and the mediator and maybe they will try to get the other party there if it helps resolve the case.
But as most who have answered this question have said, in most cases the defendant does not feel it is unnecessary to show up. You need to be there because it is up to you to decide whether to accept a settlement offer or go to trial. But the other side has most likely authorized the insurance company to pay whatever is necessary to settle the case. And typically the defendant doesn't have much to say about that since it's not their money.
But if you don't feel like you have everything you need to make a decision about your case, you might want to ask for it. And you should talk to your attorney about why it might be important to you that the other side participate.