The opposing lawyer's refusal to meet and confer with you should be a big point in your favor, as judges really hate that, but whether you're likely to get the RFAs deemed admittred depends on whether your RFAs are worded properly, or whether the defense's objections have merit because they aren't.
I'm not sure what you mean by the "judge stipulated to discovery," but if the opposing counsle or party violated a court order, you can ask for sanctions against them payable to the court under C.C.P. Section 177.5, which authorizes a judicial officer to impose reasonable monetary sanctions, not to exceed $1,500, payable to the court, “for any violation of a lawful court order by a person, done without good cause or substantial justification.”
Disclaimer: Please note that this answer does not constitute legal advice, and should not be relied on, since each state has different laws, each situation is fact specific, and it is impossible to evaluate a legal problem without a comprehensive consultation and review of all the facts and documents at issue. This answer does not create an attorney-client relationship.
I concur with Ms. Koslyn. You have a good shot at getting the requests for admission deemed admitted if the attorney failed to serve objections stating the basis of the objection, etc. We don't know what he/she may claim at the hearing on your motion but keep in mind, any time prior to the motion the opposing party can serve you with a response with or without objections. If they do that, you'll have to take your motion off calendar unless the response is unmeritorious. The court may order them to respond in 20 days. You may want to contact legal aide or local bar association for pro bono assistance. Good luck.
Disclaimer: It is impossible to evaluate a legal problem without a comprehensive legal consultation and review of all the facts and documents at issue. Consequently, this response does not constitute or establish an attorney-client relationship but is offered for general informational purposes only. Laws differ from state to state and each case turns on facts specific to the case and parties thereto, thus this answer does not constitute legal advice, and should not be relied upon as anything more than a starting point or suggestion that the questioner seek professional assistance from a practitioner in your state or county/parish, practicing in your area of law.