If you are nominated to be the Personal Representative, then you have the highest priority for appointment and the court will not appoint someone below you. You can object to her appointment, but I do not believe you have anything to worry about. In fact, unless she is named as a beneficiary under the Will, then she is not entitled to appointment, in the first place. It is possible that she is simply trying to yank your chain. You may want to retain a lawyer to keep her at bay and allow you to administer the estate in peace.
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I agree with Mr. Frederick, if you get everything under the Will, there should be no issue and the relative probably doesnt even have standing to file for appointment. If the relative is entitled to something, you may have issues depending on how long it has been since your mom died.
You definately should get your competing petition filed immediately and lodge the original will. You would be wise also to consult and hire a local probate attorney.
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Attorneys Frederick and Shultz are correct. It is vitally important that you retain an attorney to assist you in her duties, including filing the will for probate as soon as possible. Once you file the will, as the named Personal Representative, you will be given the utmost priority by the judge to serve in this role. Indeed, unless you are deemed "unfit", you'll be appointed. Finally, unless your relative has an interest in the estate, she has no standing to serve as the estate's fiduciary. Good luck to you.
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I am so sorry that your relative is causing you so much trouble. If you are the personal representative named in your mother's will, your relative is probably just wasting her time and money trying to get herself appointed.
Hiring a lawyer would give you someone else to take your relatives phone calls and handle them while you concentrate on sorting out your mother's affairs.
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I think the best advice to give you is to make an appointment with an attorney and talk it through. I don't know if your relative is trying to "steal" anything. The relative might be concerned that you are suffering from grief or some other challenge and are unable to go forward. From the way you describe it, it is unlikely the relative can gain much by probating a will that he or she is not a beneficiary under.
In any event, once you get representation you will be able to go forward and resolve the issues that occurred because of your mother's passing away.
Don't forget that the person in possession of the original will is supposed to file it with the court within 40 days of the decedent's death.