Sounds like you have a very serious custody battle going on. I suggest that you contact a good family law attorney as soon as possible. Giving up the fight because one party threatens violence seems a little contradictory to the whole point of the fight to begin with.
Get a lawyer, pay the lawyer, call in favors if you have to, and start getting some solid advice.
In accordance with the Avvo community guidelines, this communication does not constitute "legal advice", nor does it form an attorney-client relationship. You should seek counsel in your geographic area regarding any specific questions.
I'm afraid it's a bit hard to understand just what's happening from your description. (Please see this Guide: www.avvo.com/legal-guides/ugc/five-tips-for-how-to-ask-for-legal-advice-on-avvocom ) You should consult with an attorney in private.
I will say this: Child custody cases tend, at their core, to be "reasonableness contests." Your job is to appear more reasonable than the other guy. So violent and pushy tactics are deeply counterproductive. Every time a co-parent sends you a hostile text message, they're giving you a little gift, that you may be able to use against them. Don't respond in kind. Be scrupulously polite to them at all times - because, of course, all your communications might be read by a judge one day.
Please read the following notice: <br> <br> Jay Bodzin is licensed to practice law in the State of Oregon and the Federal District of Oregon, and cannot give advice about the laws of other jurisdictions. All comments on this site are intended for informational purposes only, and do not constitute legal advice or create an attorney-client relationship. No posts or comments on this site are in any way confidential. Each case is unique. You are advised to have counsel at all stages of any legal proceeding, and to speak with your own lawyer in private to get advice about your specific situation. <br> <br> Jay Bodzin, Northwest Law Office, 2075 SW First Avenue, Suite 2J, Portland, OR 97201 | Telephone: 503-227-0965 | Facsimile: 503-345-0926 | Email: email@example.com | Online: www.northwestlawoffice.com