In2010 we let my husband cousin adopt our7 yr old cuss she said that's the only way she could get medical and leave benefits to as she couldn't have Kids. She took our 2 girls in when we Went to prison in08. She said that was the only reason she'd never try to take her away and i didn't want to but i didn't want her without medical. We agreed no one would ever tell her and her name stay the same. Her mom found out and told our daughters. And of course we werent allowed to talk to them or anything. We've been clean and great people since released. We own2businesses and I'm going to real estate school. We still aren't allowed to see them or talk and I'm sick of it. We were under total distress and lied to many times. What canwe do
Not likely you can do anything. You have an adoption that is about 7 years old and a child who is now 14. Why would any court undo that situation and, you have to ask yourself if such an action is in the best interest of the child.
You can talk to a lawyer if you choose but I see nothing in your statement that justifies any alteration in the existing situation.
The pain you feel must be upsetting. Is there a way you can grow back into your daughter's life short of undoing the adoption? This is where I would focus. If you focus on becoming trusted, safe people in your daughter's life, you will begin to create the life that fits your desired dream. Undoing the adoption probably isn't something that you can legally look forward to. But maybe you can regrow and rebuild a relationship which is a wonderful thing. You have your entire life to have a relationship with her. Will your cousin allow you to integrate more into the child's life? Other things to try and consider is a full family meeting (your cousin, you and your husband, your daughter, other major players) where you all share with the child the mixed feelings you have about her parenting, your parenting flaws in the past, and your future hopes and dreams. With a facilitator present this could be very healing. Families deserve a road back to reunification. Asking for a legal change without making these smaller efforts might upset the cousin and make her refuse to share after all she has done for your children.
The adoption statute allows a birth parent one year from the date of the termination to challenge a termination order due to fraud, duress or incompetency. After one year, even if one of those grounds is present, you cannot reverse a termination order. The reason for the time limit is to avoid disrupting the child's life. I do not believe you have any grounds to ask the court to reverse or vacate the termination order.
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