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I make roughly $50K and it is increasing, wife makes $25k and is not. Married 12.5 years and have an 8 yo that will go 50/50.

San Diego, CA |

I need to leave and I need to know what can I expect? I have started seeing a therapist because she has become an unfit mother that is having severe anger issues and refuses to see a therapist or acknowledge the issue. My 8 yo came up to me just this weekend and asked if she and i can leave and move out without her mother. I don't want to deny my wife custody and therapist has said best I could get anyways is 50/50. My concern is what am I going to have to pay once we split?? Child support, spousal support? She has me convinced that becasue we have been together longer that 10 years she gets 1/2 of whatever I make. Can she actually earn more than me on take home because of support I'm going to have to pay her?

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Attorney answers 3


You need to speak to an experienced family law attorney, and figure out, after reviewing all the facts, what your rights and responsibilities are going to look like. Therapists aren't attorneys, and you don't pay them for their predictions of what a judge may or may not do. You may want to discuss with a therapist, and an attorney, what time-sharing arrangement would be best for your daughter, and how to make that work.


I agree with the previous answer, you really need to consult an attorney in your area who can give you confidential advice. Black letter law starts at a 50/50 split so start by expecting that and fight for primary custody of your child.

Good luck, you have a long road ahead@

Thomas A. Schaeffer, Esq. Law Office of Juarez and Schaeffer PO Box 16216, San Diego, CA 92105 (619) 804-4327 This posting is provided for "informational purposes" only and should not be relied upon as "legal advice." Nothing transmitted from this posting constitutes the establishment of an attorney-client relationship. Applicability of the legal principals discussed here may differ substantially in individual situations or in different States.


Your inquiries involved somewhat complex matters. The court will determine the custody and visitation issues based on the child's best interests. If the mother is having anger issues that are impacting the child and her desire to spend time with her mother, that is something the court will consider regarding the time share arrangement. Mom can also be ordered to attend counseling or anger management classes to address anger issues. The child's preferences may also be considered and given due weight. Once the timeshare is established, the court will set child support based on the guideline formula in California, which factors in each party's net income and the timeshare percentage. Spousal support is based on a long list of factors, but primarily the lower income earner's need and the higher earner's ability to pay based on the marital standard of living. Typically, in 50/50 custodial situations, the higher income earner has around 55% of the combined net spendable income after the payment of support. I would be happy to assist with providing more detailed information specific to your case and to represent you in court proceedings for dissolution of your marriage, including resolution of the custody, visitation and support issues. If you would like further assistance, please feel free to contact my office. 619-338-8393.

This response is not intended to create an attorney-client relationship. The information offered in this response is for general informational purposes only and should not be relied upon without further consultation with a legal professional after all relevants facts are disclosed and considered.

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