My son's father and I divorced years ago. I have remarried and my husband and son seem to get along fine. My child's father warned my son, in the beginning, that my new husband was not to discipline him. My son is now refusing to attend school, coming and going as he pleases, and the worst thing, he lies all of the time. I can't believe anything he says. He steals cigarettes and other things from me. I was told he takes my car out at night when I'm sleeping (no permit). I now lock everything up and sleep with my car keys under my pillow. What should I do??? Please direct me. Oh, his father moved out of state, but maintains his rights. He's not at all interested in disciplining him. Dad wants to be his buddy.
No offense, but many of us parents are in the same situation. Teenagers are extremely difficult. It also sounds as if his natural father and step father want to be buddies and not discipline him (your step father can discipline him regardless of what the natural father says) and a teenage boy needs a male role model to law down the law and set limits. In my experience as a prosecutor, a judge, and as a father, I can virtually guarantee you that your son is trying to see what he can get away with and pushing the envelope and actually WANTS you to set limits for him. Setting limits shows that you care. There is an exceptional cognitive behavioral therapist in Aurora who is the best in the state and quite affordable. Her name is Jane Plattner and runs the Center for Life Change off of Alameda and Potomac. You should definitely contact her and have you and your current husband meet with her to set up tools for setting ground rules for your son and getting him under control sooner rather than later. Trust me, it will just get worse unless you do something sooner rather than later.
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