A simple negotiation is in order under these circumstances. Contact a lawyer in your county and discuss disclosure requirements - see if the expense is worth it to you.
Under the rules governing the conduct of attorneys in New York it may be necessary to remind you that this answer could be considered attorney advertising.
I'm sorry you are going through this difficult time. You are asking the right questions but it would be impossible to know the answers to them from this post on the internet. It's time you start speaking with an attorney.
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