You have a lot of very specific questions that are far too individualized to answer here on AVVO. I encourage you to retain legal counsel to advise you of how to proceed.
THIS ANSWER IS FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY, DOES NOT CONSTITUTE LEGAL ADVICE, AND DOES NOT CREATE AN ATTORNEY-CLIENT RELATIONSHIP. Immigration is complicated and the wrong action can have serious consequences. Never take action in your case based solely on general information like is offered here. Speak to an attorney who can give you specific advice about your own situation.
You and your wife do have a right to provide a rebuttal response to the Notice of Intent to Deny, but you must do so within the deadline and in a way that addresses the concerns raised by the consular officer(s). In terms of the evidence, if there were concerns mentioned in the NOID, then yes, those are things that will need to be explained and documented in the rebuttal, or they will continue to be concerns that may result in a final denial. There is not a "magic" amount or kind of evidence. Rather, it is important that there be valid explanations for missing evidence and that the concerns of the consular officer(s) be sufficiently addressed.
I agree with my colleague that it appears you would benefit from consulting with an experienced immigration attorney about the deadlines and other concerns with your NOID response. If cost is a concern in obtaining legal counsel, there are several non-profit organizations in the New York City area. For help locating someone to assist you, you can look here on Avvo, at www.aila.org, or www.immigrationlawhelp.com.
Ms. Doerrie's answer to your question is general in nature, as not all facts and circumstances relating to the specific person(s) and situations involved are known to her. Ms. Doerrie recommends consulting with an immigration attorney regarding your specific facts and circumstances prior to making any legal decision or submitting any form or application. This response does not constitute legal advice or create an attorney/client relationship.
I agree with my colleagues.
PROFESSOR OF IMMIGRATION LAW for over 10 years -- This blog posting is offered for informational purposes only. It does not constitute an attorney-client relationship.