My husband and I have been married almost 12 years. We have one 9 year old son. My husband was abused as a child, and he is mentally and verbally abusive to my son and I, but never physical. Although when angry he frequently slams things around and has broken things. He threatens to take my son so I'll "never see him again". He has an alcohol problem as well. While arguing one day he was in my face yelling and slamming his hand on a glass table. I pushed him and he fell and lost his balance. Now he's threatening to call the police and tell them I'm physically abusive to him. I just want to get out of this volatile marriage and protect my son from his controlling behavior.
OK. So start by moving out. If that is not possible, then see if he will. You might have grounds for divorce, but maybe not. The facts are important. With grounds, you can seek orders to get him out of the house, possibly. You do however face your own issues from that violence.
All in all, is there anyone that can come in and help? A family friend or pastor? He needs to address his issues regardless of divorce. But if he does, it may get rid of the problem you have.
Lacking any of that, divorce can only start after you separate.
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