With all due respect, your expectations are unreasonable on several levels. First of all, you are expecting a private attorney, who has living expenses and overhead to cover, to work for free. Many attorneys accept cases like yours on a pro bono basis through legal services programs where applicants are screened for financial and subject matter eligibility. Even through those programs, however, cases like yours are not particularly attractive to attorneys due to unrealistic expectations and the propensity of cases like this trap the attorney into a case that never ends.
It is possible that the current state of the ex's parental rights does not include contact, and legal procedings outside the restraining order would need to be initiated by the father. Your needs will be best served by finding a way to purchase a consultation with an experienced family law practitioner to learn the answers for your case.
Best wishes for an outcome you can accept, and please remember to designate a best answer.
This answer is offered as a public service for general information only and may not be relied upon as legal advice.
I agree with Ms. Sinclair. You cannot force an attorney to take a case on pro bono. Furthermore, your case sounds like it is likely to be complicated. You certainly would benefit from advice of an experienced family law attorney.