Probably not. Usually the only way to get the prosecutor to drop such an Order is to go to them and tell them that you won't go through with the trial if they call you to testify. However, remember, they can still Subpoena you and that can often be enforced by the Court.
Its usually best practice to go to them and appeal to them and ask them nicely, but very firmly, that you want to drop the Order. They won't do it until the next court appearance in almost all cases.
Check with a local attorney too, since I practice in NY.
The restraining order is not difficult to vacate. For that you can simply go to the court where you got it and request that they vacate the order. They will want to make sure that no one is coercing you to do so, but if you are insistent (but polite), they will vacate (get rid of) the Restraining Order. You may want to consult with an attorney before you go but you should be able to do this on your own.
Regarding the A&B charges. You can request that the Assistant District Attorney (ADA) dismiss the A&B charges. Most ADAs are reluctant to do so and can actually summons you into court and try to force you to testify against your boyfriend (b/f). If the the ADA refuses to drop/dismiss the charges, your boyfriend may have to get an attorney. Do not let the ADA convince you to go forward if you do not want to. I handle these situations all the time and it essentially requires protecting both your rights and your b/f's rights. The ADA may threaten you with a perjury charge or filing a Filing A False Police Report charge if they really want to push it. If you would like to discuss this in more detail, feel free to call me at (877) 752-7501. It is toll free and I would not charge you for the consultation. You may be able to do this yourself and if not I would be happy to advise you and represent your b/f if necessary.
This is not an easy task. The police may have collected their own evidence and the prosecutor will probably push on. There are ways to drop it though. If you want to give me a call I'll talk to you about it.
Joseph Chancellor (617) 725-2675
You don't have to wait until the pretrial conference to vacate the restraining order; you can go to the courthouse at any time, fill out a motion to vacate with a supporting affidavit and have the motion heard. Be prepared to tell the judge the reason why you want the order vacated, and be aware that the victim advocate may try to talk you out of vacating the order. Keep in mind that you may also have the order modified, for example, by removing the stay away provision and keeping the no abuse provision in.
As for getting the A&B charges dropped, the decision to drop the case is not in your hands, but rather in the hands of the prosecutor's office. The Norfolk County DA's office will not dismiss a domestic assault and battery case prior to the trial date, even if you tell them you are not on board. Expect to receive a summons to appear for trial. On the day of trial, however, if the alleged victim is not on board and there are no other witnesses for the DA to use to make her case, then a dismissal without prejudice is usually granted.