It would not be defamation any way. Defamation is a false statement of fact that damages a person's reputation and the person can show their damages to the court. If he is putting false text with the photo it may be defamation or false light again, she has to prove damages. But there is no falsity here. it is in fact her. Also, she gave consent to the photo and let him keep the negative/digital. She will have a very tough time in court because it will be he said/she said. Also, she would have to show the court she suffered damages i.e., economic damages she hopes to recover. If he tries to profit from it, she can take action. She can also report it to Facebook, but they may not remove, and she can not force them. You can not do anything for her, only she has the legal standing to do anything. She can always have a local lawyer send him a legal letter, but he is not obligated to comply.
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Your cousin should contact FB through their customer service site and if the picture is "racy" enough, they will remove it.
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I would check with a lawyer near you - I think there was a recent law passed that may give you recourse for unauthorized posting of photographs.
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First thing you should do is ask the website to take down the photo.
Second thing you should do is ask the ex boyfriend to take down the photo AND let him know that under NJ law he has committed a crime, specifically, he has violated NJSA 2C:14-9. Invasion of privacy, degree of crime; defenses, privileges, subsection "c". Further under NJ civil law, which provides the highest degree of privacy in the nation, there is a claim against him for disclosure of private facts because for a claim of disclosure of private facts one had to prove the following elements, “(1) public disclosure (2) of a private fact (3) offensive to a reasonable person; and (4) not a legitimate public concern.”
If notice he is given does not result in the photo being taken down, the court's will make him do so by court order. I would suggest that you have an attorney do this filing to have it done correctly.
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