Unfortunately, this is a difficult question, since most states will not give you the release that you seek. However, frequently I see that people in this situation will simply use the maiden name to register their children for school, etc., or alternately, use a hyphenated combination of the maiden name and the husband's name. Then at a later date, people try to file a name change and argue that the only name which the child knows is the mother's maiden name.
In all fairness, it is very difficult to get this relief.. Consult a local attorney. Good luck.
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