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Domestic Abuse Victim afraid for her life

San Luis, CO |

My friend's ex has been charged with Domestic Violence and served time . He is still under a restraining order and probation but he still drinks and he shows up at her house all the time She lets him see the girls because they cry that they miss and love him . But he still rages and looses his temper constantly . Recently she sent me some texts to the extent of , " If he thought I was going to turn him in , I believe he would kill me " or " If I go missing , it wasn't an accident " ( paraphrased for privacy ) . I'm not a lawyer so I'm trying to read CO state DB laws and it seems that even if she did turn him in , he could just come and kill her in two years when he is released since he has only one previous DB conviction . Is this true ?

Also, she refuses to leave her house because she runs her business from there and it is her only means of income. Her ex pays no child support.

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Attorney answers 3


Your friend is involved in a horrible situation. Unfortunately, there is no piece of paper in the world that is going to protect her. That said, she need to let law enforcement know what is going on -- there simply is no other way.

In no way am I offering you legal advice, and in no way has my comment created an attorney-client relationship. You are not to rely upon my note above in any way, but insted need to sit down with counsel and share all relevant facts before receiving fully-informed legal advice. If you want to be completely sure of your rights, you must sit down with an experienced criminal defense attorney to be fully aware of your rights.


Sometimes, unfortunately, your best option is the one you refuse to do. To protect herself she may have to give up the home and start over somewhere else. As my colleague noted, no piece of paper can truly protect her. Sometimes the choice is be harmed, or worse, or leave. He is violating the protection order and his probation rules. Even if she is "letting him" he is still violating the order and could be arrested. She cannot waive the protection order for him. Don't mean to be harsh, but she's going to have to decide what's more important, her house or her life.

This answer should not be construed to create any attorney-client relationship. Such a relationship can be formed only through the mutual execution of an attorney-client agreement. The answer given is based on the extremely limited facts provided and the proper course of action might change significantly with the introduction of other facts. All who read this answer should not rely on the answer to govern their conduct. Please seek the advice of competent counsel after disclosing all facts to that attorney. This answer is intended for Colorado residents only. The answering party is only licensed to practice in the State of Colorado.


Dear San Luis, CO

This is an incredibly dangerous situation. When I was a Deputy District Attorney I investigated too many cases where someone in your situation did nothing and their friend ended up seriously injured and sometimes much worse. You should take your friends fear seriously and do all you can to help her out.

You are correct that the laws in Colorado do have limits to how long your friend's ex will be supervised and/or incarcerated.

I would be happy to speak to you and give you suggestions of ways you can help your friend for no charge.

visit my website for my contact information.