For goodness sake put no more private info on this public forum. It will bite you on the behind. Get a publicist specializing in crisis management to deal with the public info aspects. Then get a LA entertainment lawyer here on AVVO. But do not expect them to call you--that is not considered proper on the part of a lawyer. Lastly, rescue yourself, think about all that happened, learn what mistakes you made, and do not expect others to save you. They can only help.
Licensed in Maryland with offices in Maryland and Oregon. Information here is general, does not create a lawyer-client relationship, and is not a substitute for consulting with an experienced attorney on the specifics of your situation.
I concur with the advice of the attorneys below, but I see no necessary reason to use an entertainment lawyer for defamation (libel via the internet). Defamation is a "disfavored tort" because it conflicts with the fundamental constitutional rights of freedom of speech and expression just as adult entertainment conflicts with prudish societal mores. Your ex may have a "privilege" to communicate about matters with her fans, who professional contacts, etc. that might allow falsehoods not exceeding the scope of the privilege. It's also possible that the behavior that irritates you might actually help you in your career. If you have/had an hearing you ought to have/had an attorney.
In short, having an attorney to guide you will influence the outcome of almost any case.
Defamation law is particularly difficult to defend or sue because it involves countless elements and exception.
If you try to sue her, the fact that you purposely cast yourself into the public limelight makes any claim by you more difficult. Since you profit from making yourself a public figure the law protects you less than someone who makes every attempt to remain private.
As a public figure, you must not only prove her statements are untrue, you must prove that the statements made or capable of being true or false. For instance, calling someone a "jerk" would rarely withstand a defamation claim because there is no way to establish factually whether someone is jerk or not.
Thus, it is not insults that you are protected from, but form factual assertions that are untrue and were make by the person knowing they were false with the intent to cause you harm.
He said, she said cases don't work, because it becomes very difficult to prove she even made that statement.
Damages are also tricky. Defamatory statements made by her directly to you do not cause injury because although they may make you feel bad, they must be overheard by someone who can cause you actual loss just from hearing the statement. They must not only hear it they must also act upon the statement in a way that causes you direct and identifiable damages.
Finally, there are often better causes of actions to pursue in defamation cases, like trade liable or interference with a contractual relationship.
Whatever you do, sit down with an attorney who is knowledgeable in this area before doing anything that results in nothing but protracted and expensive litigation, spurred in the beginning by an emotional motivation as opposed to a business one.