I see you're tagged as being in northbrook. If you want to learn about legal aid in the Cook County area, or get info about representing yourself, CARPLS is an option - www.carpls.org
Otherwise, you can try to shoot for finding a lawyer who can provide unbundled services if you can't afford a full scope attorney, or just handle some things on your own.
If you go the legal aid route, you should start making calls ASAP. They are congested and it could take time to get an intake interview.
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I agree with advice provided by attorney Malloy. In addition, you should at least sit down face to face with one (or a few) attorneys in person. Most lawyers will work with you to and may have ideas to help you come up with a retainer. See if any friends or family can loan you funds to get a lawyer. If there is a lot at stake, you may not be able to afford NOT HAVING A LAWYER. It could cost you far more in the long run if you about it by yourself.
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I doubt you will qualify for legal aid with owning more than one property (mortgages), three cars, and a decent income from your job. You have to either sell a car (s), some other property, take a loan against the property, borrow from a friend/relative, or cash in part of the 401K and pay the penalty. You really cannot expect lawyers to help you out representing you pro bono when you are not taking self help to the maximum yourself. You are living a lifestyle you cannot afford so change it.
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This does not sound like a situation where you would qualify for legal aid services. Representing yourself can be difficult on many levels and is fraught with pitfalls that you might ultimately regret, particularly if your spouse has counsel who is guiding her. Divorce can be a complicated subject matter if you don't have a working knowledge of your rights. I would suggest a consultation with an attorney, which will cost you 1 hour at that lawyer's hourly rate, so you can get a little education regarding what you are dealing with.