The reality today is that anyone who uses the internet has put a lot of their own personal information online for others to get, perfectly legally. Not every use is legal, of course, but getting your name, address and phone number is probably available on zabasearch.com, and other free sites, not to mention from paid sites and private detectives.
How has this site ruined your life? A lawsuit needs damages, and you haven't detailed any.
If there's someone stalking you, there are other remedies, such as a civil restraining order, and you might to look into that. TYou can also change your phone number, since this woman apparently knew your phone number.
Disclaimer: Please note that this answer does not constitute legal advice, and should not be relied on, since each state has different laws, each situation is fact specific, and it is impossible to evaluate a legal problem without a comprehensive consultation and review of all the facts and documents at issue. This answer does not create an attorney-client relationship.
Many of these websites get information from the public record and information that you disclose to others like posting on the Internet. There is nothing illegal about coordinating this information and selling it to others. It is unfortunate, but this is a byproduct of our interconnected world.
For possible alternatives, my colleague is a California attorney and I would follow her advice.
[This communication is intended as general information and not specific legal advice, and this communication does not create an attorney-client relationship.]