My divorce trial lasted over a year and there were, lets say shenanigans, involved on the courts, and my exes behalf. I have been told by my own attorney that I may, but my ex said I can't without her consent. I understand that the case is public record. I am asking about the minutiae. The emails that show changes in my exes narrative, including purgery, slander, and defamation. The trial has been resolved. I have lost the house, and the savings, but thank goodness I am custodial parent.
It was a learning process to say the least, and I want to share what I learned, so others won't lose so much in order to learn the same things.
Thank heavens you got finished with the legal proceedings part of your divorce! Now you have the challenging and rewarding job of living your new life and the blessing of being primary parent to your children.
I think that your question is two questions. Do I have the legal right to tell the world about the ugly things that I believe/know happened in my marriage and divorce? and Should I use my time and energy digging up and displaying (for the public and for my children's future reading) the unfortunate behaviors and decisions that took place over the course of this painful part of my life?
If you think that the answer to the second question is yes, then I recommend that you consult with a wise family law attorney about getting an answer to the first question. An excellent way to help other people who are going through the pain of divorce is to find a career or volunteer path to work in that field. We can use the help of good people who care about making it less bad.
Take good care of yourself and your kiddos. Remember that "Living well is the best revenge."
I fully concur with the answer of Ms. Denton. However, I will add that you could subject yourself to liability by taking the action you propose. You want to accuse your ex, and it appears the court, of inappropriate behavior based upon your perception that "shenanigans" went on.
I agree with the two answers above and I will add, be careful. If you are too abusive in your telling, you being to look like a harassing person. If you report facts that are questionable and she's litigious, you may face a libel/slander lawsuit. It's also sometimes not the best use of your time focusing on the past. Is there anything more worthy of your time now that that chapter of your life is finished? Yes, helping others in a similar situation is a nice thing to do. But is that your real motivation? Or is it to hurt her? If you're considered to be a harassing, obsessive person, that can turn around and bite you later in an anti-harassment action against you. High conflict people don't let things go. Are you being high conflict? Or, if she is high conflict will this be like poking the bear? With children involved, it hurts them if they see and watch you continue to fight with her. So don't be sharing your information with the children. It is ok to show emails to others. But setting out to ruin her reputation could border on harassment. So be careful. Check out the material at HighConflictInstitute.com to educate yourself on when conflict crosses the line over into high conflict. http://www.highconflictinstitute.com/
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