If it happened in California, you would be sued for negligent entrustment, and would have to seek indemnification and contribution from the DUI driver. Here is more info about
The answer will depend on the state that you live in. You may have civil liability as a result of the accident. You absolutely need the driver to be involved in this case. In fact, you may want to consider taking this person to court if they do not respond to your inquiries. That may be the only way to get a response.
As to your insurance questions, you will need to refer to your policy to see what the terms are. Also, you will need to see if the driver was insured. Unfortunately, it is hard to give a straight answer to your questions. Call a lawyer in your state for a free consultation regarding your civil liability and insurance concerns.
If she was criminally charged for Operating while intoxicated (and maybe criminal damage to property) you will be a victim and get restitution through the criminal action. However, insurance companies will often pay for you loss and then seek to get reimbursed from her insurance company or from restitution.