I have been separated for some time now and have no idea if she took it upon herself to do or not
You are still married. File for divorce, if you wish to be otherwise.
All of Ms. Straus’ responses are offered as useful information, based solely upon the facts stated in the question, and are not to be relied upon as alegal opinion. They may not be what you wished to hear, They do not create an attorney-client relationship. Ms. Straus has been licensed to practice law in California for 34 years. Ms. Straus regrets that she does not provide follow up free advice via email. She also regrets that blunt responses may be taken as "rude" by those who wished a different opinion. Good luck.
Separation does not produce a divorce. Do a public records search in the county where she lives to see if she filed a divorce and if a judgment was entered that terminated the marriage.
If you were not served with the petition and summons, the divorce process has not commenced, thus are still married. You can generally search your local family court records by last name to see if a petition was ever filed
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