Attorney Williams gives good advice. Allow me as a NY attorney to ad that while your urgency is understandable, there is no risk of the divorce going through without you having a say in the matter. In NY, personal service upon the defendant of a Summons with Notice or Summons and Verified Complaint is required in a matrimonial action. When you are served, you will have at least 20 days to answer so as to avoid a default. Start looking around for a divorce attorney now.