In the blog entry linked here, I describe how challenging it's been to embrace the transformative perspective. I explain that what used to seem like problems to overcome (the parties' anger and distrust) have become exactly the places where focused attention is the most important. That is, the anger and distrust are actually the thing that the parties are seeking help with - helping with those aspects also happens to be the most direct route to a settlement. Getting comfortable with this realilty was challenging in a world where most professionals believe it's more helpful to ignore that ugly stuff, or to try to talk clients out of it.