1

Hire an attorney to either represent you or coach you through the process.

Many people get themselves in hot water because they don't want to spend the money on a lawyer. A wise person said that one who had him/herself for a lawyer had a fool for a client. You don't know what you don't know. Even if you are a lawyer by profession, you are not able to be objective in your case. Get someone to either coach you to review court documents and help you fill them out, or hire someone to represent you. Ask around and find a lawyer whose practice philosophy is to settle cases, not fight.

2

Hire a mental health counselor to help you with your emotions.

When people are frightened, their primitive brain is in charge. This part of your brain, the amygdala, controls your fight or flight response. In order to make good decisions in your divorce, you need your higher thinking powers. Your family and friends do not have the skills, nor, frankly, the patience, to talk to you about your divorce case. A mental health counselor, such as someone with an MSW, LCSW, or other mental health training, can help you not only process the emotions you experience in your divorce, but can help you create a new future for yourself.

3

Start a regular exercise program if you don't already exercise.

Physical exercise gives your body the ability to work out the toxins that build up in your body from the emotional stress of your divorce case. You don't need to be a marathon runner to benefit from exercise. Even a yoga DVD or daily walking after dinner every day will help you feel physically better and keep your mind sharp. Sometimes people find a sport in which they are able to whack a ball helpful because they can put their feelings into the ball and use that as a stress relief. Sports such as tennis, racquetball, golf, volleyball, or tetherball can be very helpful to burn off stress. Activities such as yoga, qi gong, or tai chi can help you center your mind and body and bring peace and balance into your life. Getting regular massages or reiki (energy work) can also help you rid yourself of stress. No matter what activity you choose, anything is better than doing nothing! You will benefit from whatever you do and it will help you get through the process!